She has wanted to race Fat Salmon for years. She just feels like she's not good enough.
So she thinks about swimming the annual race, and doesn't.
Then she bullies herself for not racing.
Completes the loop.
Awareness is the way out of prison. And sometimes support to get yourself in the race.
The good news is she is swimming this year-- if the water is clean enough.
There is always something that is going to happen.
But at least trying by getting in the race is a great start on a new adventure past the kick me looping that is a placeholder for discovery, curiosity and learning mindset.